doesmyarsenallookbiginthesepants:
We can’t all leap tall buildings or shoot lasers out of our eyes or save the world, but we can always save ourselves. You’re stronger than you think.
(from All Star Superman)
i am never ever EVER not reblogging this.
i will ALWAYS reblog this…
Oh man is this powerful
If only we all had a Superman in our lives to help us in our darkest hours.
Screw x-ray vision, super-strength, and super-weaving. That right there is his best super-power.
(There is a long line at a small local convenience store due to a very nice but inexperienced cashier. The cashier messes up a purchase for the second time…)
Owner, to cashier: ¬†”What the f*** is wrong with you?! You are so f***ing worthless!”
Customer: “How dare you talk to her like that!…
*slow clap.*
((I keep getting more and more followers! I can’t take it, man! The pressure to provide content, it’s too much! <.< >.>
*juggles some balls to provide a distraction while he comes up with something.))
“oh great…Im terrible at etymology AND puns…” She trudges into the cave
“That’s alright, I’m usually pretty good at it. So, you’ll handle the talking to people and not doing the first stupid thing that pops into your head and getting us both killed, and I’ll handle the things you aren’t good at. That’s teamwork. Or at least a reasonable facsimile thereof.”
As the two explorers enter the cave, the odd ruby necklace begins to glow with a soft red light, just bright enough to see by, revealing a small entryway with more than ample evidence of bats inhabiting the cave during the day. At the far wall are two doors, clearly designed to be readily opened by ponykind, but without any distinguishing marks or signs of what lay beyond. Above them is another sign, it’s lettering changing to be readable as the ruby’s light touches it.
” ‘It may not be the obvious choice, but the less pleasant path may lead to greater reward’? That hardly tells us anything. How do we know which path is less pleasant? Can you smell anything?”
“Hrmm… Everything we need to answer the question is right in front of us…” One hoof reached up in what would be, with the addition of fingers, a stroking motion along the bottom of Stargazer’s chin. “… It’s going to be a stupid pun, isn’t it? Some kind of lame joke involving Gryphons?”
“What? No. Not… not a lame joke. It’s actually pretty clever. Bilingual, even.”
“Oh, Celestia’s mane.”
Hmm…Watch it be griffon or just another spelling of it…
“No… he said Bilingual. So it’s going to a Dragon named Draco thing, I bet. Something stupid like… … Leo? Oh, zounds. Leo Aquila. Lion Eagle in old equestrian.”
“… Partial credit to both of you, actually. Leonard Griffon Aquila. Honestly? I’m only here for the duel to the death part, and I’m a bit sick of listening to you bad-mouth my riddle. So, yes, you pass. Congratulations, you get the ruby and may enter the cave. Good luck from here, kid. Looks like you’ll need it with Mister Smart-Guy helping you out.”
With that parting shot at our stalwart hero, Leo removes a ruby mounted on a golden chain from the tuft of feathers at his neck, drapes it carefully on Dinky’s horn, and then pumps his wings twice, hard.
“Oh, and since I kind of like you, kid, a word of advice. There are a lot of puns in the labyrinth, and you would do well to remember were some words come from.”
“hmm…Im short on ideas…Anything from you?”
“Hrmm… Everything we need to answer the question is right in front of us…” One hoof reached up in what would be, with the addition of fingers, a stroking motion along the bottom of Stargazer’s chin. “… It’s going to be a stupid pun, isn’t it? Some kind of lame joke involving Gryphons?”
“What? No. Not… not a lame joke. It’s actually pretty clever. Bilingual, even.”
“Oh, Celestia’s mane.”
than all the half naked girls on tumblr.
FOREVER REBLOG <3
Well… we’re only talking the HALF naked girls, right?
“well…The first and obvious choice of question is simply “what is your name?” not that I expect that to work, but if you cant answer it, it cant count as my question, right?”
“Correct. If you answer a question I cannot or will not answer, it does not count as your question. Also, I choose to interpret the rules such that asking for clarifications of the rules does not use your one question, and thus asking me to confirm that you don’t use up your one question by asking me a question I cannot or will not answer also does not use up your one question.”
((This gryphon totally has a soft spot for kids or something. <.< Or he’s being written by a guy who purposely shuts down his inner Killer DM. ;) ))
“well…Yeah! That’s why we’re here!”
“Very well, then. Under regular circumstance, the first of the trials would be a simple combat between the challengers and myself, but as that option is… distasteful, to say the least, I offer a simple riddle… What is my name?”
Stargazer’s head burst out from the underbrush. “What? That’s ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous?”
“Yeah, that Rumplestiltzkin stuff works for fairy tales, but as a challenge? There’s no way we can just randomly guess you name. That’s like asking us to count all the sands on a beach!”
“I assure you, all the information you need is right in front of you. Now then, you have three guesses.”
“Each.”
“Total!”
“Three guesses and three questions each.”
“… Three guesses for both of you, and one question each.”
“Done.”
“I can’t believe you negotiated the challenge you’re being given in place of being killed and eaten.”
“Well, I totally did. Now then… Miss Hooves? Time to be exceptionally clever, I suspect.”
Um…Alright…Hey mister Gryphon! *she cautiously steps out of the brush, ready to leap back in if it approaches too hostilely*
The Gryphon whirls around, snarling and rising up with wings extended, at the young filly’s voice. Then, with a surprised expression, he looks down a bit. “A child? You brought a child here, to face the challenges and claim the treasures? What sort of irresponsible madman would do such a thing?”
“Hey, I resemble that remark!”
Folding his wings in and dropping to all four limbs, the Gryphon glares over his shoulder at the Pegasus still carefully hidden in the bushes. “Unbelievable. And now you hide behind her? You are either the most disgusting sort of coward, or the basest of villains. Luckily for yourself and this filly, I will not harm one so young.” He turns back to Dinky, looking disgruntled and resigned. “Speak, then, child. Would you seek entrance to the cavern, to brave the dangers and challenge for the prizes there within?”
